As Axios has reported, companies are taking ever more daring positions on social and political issues because of intense pressure from the public and their own employees. At a time of rock bottom trust in institutions and leaders, corporations are among the very few remaining bastions of public confidence, says Edelman, the public relations firm.
The latest example is Salesforce, which has recently barred certain gun sellers from using its e-commerce software, per the Washington Post. It follows a trend of companies targeting guns:
Amazon and eBay have both banned the sale of firearms on their platforms.
Shopify has stopped providing its software to merchants who sell semi-automatic firearms and silencers, among other weapons.
Walmart, the country’s biggest gun seller, has stopped selling the weapons to customers under 21. And Dick’s Sporting Goods has pulled all assault-style guns from its shelves.
Firms have waded into other debates, too: In an outcry over abortion rights, Hollywood studios are threatening to stop filming in Georgia. And two years ago, a backlash by PayPal, the NCAA, Bank of America and others forced North Carolina to repeal a “bathroom bill” that discriminated against transgender individuals.
“We are concerned by the rise of boardroom legislation by unelected corporate leaders,” says Lawrence Keane, SVP of public affairs for the National Shooting Sports Foundation. “It’s particularly troubling when the companies making the decisions have tons of market power.”
The big picture: While firms are well within their rights to take a stand, their actions take on new significance when unelected businesses have the same sort of power as government officials, says Luigi Zingales of the University of Chicago.
In early 2018, Facebook and Google banned ads for cryptocurrency exchanges. That meant 60% of all online ads were off limits to cryptocurrency companies.
The combined actions of Amazon, eBay, Shopify and, now, Salesforce, have effectively banned the online sale of certain guns.
The bottom line: Look for continued corporate activism, as socially minded employees and consumers show no sign of wavering in their insistence on their companies taking such positions.
“It has a lot to do with the war for talent,” says Louis Hyman, a historian at Cornell. “In an age where the corporate talent is socially liberal, companies that do not take these positions are risking their key assets.”
“It’s not really companies who are making this difference. It’s the consumers who support these companies,” says Heather Cox Richardson, a professor at Boston College.
In the 1920s, Edward Bernays, the so-called “father of public relations,” wrote several influential books outlining the principles of successful propaganda. In his book by that title, Bernays argued that “the mind of the people…is made up for it by…those persons who understand the manipulation of public opinion” and know how to skillfully supply the public with “inherited prejudices” and “verbal formulas.”
Bernays’ comments come to mind in the current climate of hostility and intolerance being directed against individuals pejoratively dubbed by the vaccine lobby as “anti-vaxxers.” The dumbed-down propaganda being plastered across the mainstream media on an almost daily basis would have the public believe that anyone who questions any aspect of vaccination is ignorant, selfish or both. However, there is a glaring flaw with this logic. The incontrovertible fact—which the legislators, regulators, reporters and citizens who are participating in mass tarring and feathering are not honest enough to admit—is that many of the people classified as “anti-vaxxers” are actually “ex-vaxxers” whose dutiful adherence to current vaccine policies led to serious vaccine injury in themselves or a loved one.
Parental compliance with the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention’s (CDC’s) heavy-duty vaccine requirements for infants is often the catalyst for the injuries that start families down the path of becoming ex-vaxxers.
From compliance to injury
Vaccine coverage in the United States is high. In their first three years, over 99% of American children receive some vaccines. By the government’s indirect admission, however, vaccine-related adverse events are also common—with fewer than 1% of vaccine injuries ever getting reported.
Parental compliance with the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention’s (CDC’s) heavy-duty vaccine requirements for infants is often the catalyst for the injuries that start families down the path of becoming “ex-vaxxers.” In one tragic case, a parent who followed doctors’ orders lost her six-week-old infant girl 12 hours after the child received eight vaccines; medical experts’ conclusion that vaccination was the cause of death prompted a different valuation of risks and benefits with a subsequent child. There are many other such stories. Moreover, when individuals who suffer nonfatal vaccine injuries stick to the standard vaccination regimen, research shows that they often experience even more severe injuries the next time around.
In the U.S., vaccines have been liability-free since 1986—and evidence suggests that vaccine safety has deteriorated significantly as a result. The only current recourse for the vaccine-injured is to file a petition with the stingy and slow-moving National Vaccine Injury Compensation Program (NVICP). Although the NVICP has paid out over $4 billion in taxpayer-funded compensation, it denies far more petitions than it awards. The family of the six-week-old described in the preceding paragraph eventually received NVICP compensation, but not before the program expended considerable effort to leave the cause of death unexplained. And, literally adding insult to injury, the maximum payout for any vaccine-related death is only $250,000.
The chair of a Food and Drug Administration (FDA) committee has stated, ‘Congress is getting paid to not hold pharma accountable.’
Money talks
When people or their loved ones are vaccine-injured, many begin to unravel the unscrupulous world of pharmaceutical influence on our media, government agency leaders and lawmakers. Connecting the dots is a horrifying and enlightening experience, exposing facts to which the general public generally remains oblivious. These revelations weigh heavily when someone makes the decision to permanently change into an “ex-vaxxer.”
Why would the people’s elected representatives (and the officials they appoint) propagate smears, promote censorship and ignore the testimonials of the many families that have experienced devastating vaccine injuries?
Why would officialdom ignore the escalating fiscal implications of vaccine injuries, which are imposing a staggering financial burden on households and taxpayers?
Why do the media increasingly advocate for the elimination of informed consent and vaccine choice?
One of the inescapable answers has to do with the overt and covert influence of pharmaceutical industry funding on those who shape vaccine policy and public opinion.
At the government level, senior Senators openly admit that “drug companies have too much influence in Washington,” with big pharma spending more than any other industry on lobbying and campaign contributions. For example, the pharmaceutical industry poured an estimated $100 million into the 2016 elections, rewarding politicians on both sides of the aisle with its largesse. The chair of a Food and Drug Administration (FDA) committee has stated, “Congress is getting paid to not hold pharma accountable” [emphasis added].
…studies show that medical journal advertising generates “the highest return on investment of all promotional strategies employed by pharmaceutical companies.”
Not content to just influence legislators, the pharmaceutical industry puts equally high value on print advertising directed at doctors—the all-important “gatekeepers” between drug companies and patients. In fact, studies show that medical journal advertising generates “the highest return on investment of all promotional strategies employed by pharmaceutical companies.”
Covering all bases, pharmaceutical companies also advertise vaccines and other drugs directly to U.S. consumers. The U.S. is one of only two countries in the world (along with New Zealand) that permits this type of direct-to-consumer pandering. Drug company spending on television and print advertising in the U.S. rose to $5.2 billion in 2016—a 60% increase over 2012—with untold additional amounts spent on digital and social media advertising. Astoundingly, pharmaceutical companies even get a tax break for these marketing expenditures, a corporate deduction that costs taxpayers billions annually.
The media benefit handsomely from the steady infusion of pharma advertising dollars. Four networks (CBS, ABC, NBC and Fox) received two-thirds of the TV ad monies spent on top-selling drugs in 2015, with the Prevnar 13 vaccine representing the eighth most-advertised pharmaceutical product that year. Under these bought-media circumstances, it is somewhat astonishing that a few media outlets were willing to concede that drug money “coursing through the veins of Congress” directly contributed to the opioid crisis. So far, however, no reporters have been willing to connect similar dots between drug money and unsafe vaccines.
What the WHO failed to mention, however, is the preponderant role of “commercial interests”—and especially pharmaceutical industry interests—in shaping its goals and strategies.
Pharmaceutical industry influence makes itself felt not just domestically but also globally, and this has led to a corresponding amping-up of rhetoric against “anti-vaxxers” around the world. In early 2019, the World Health Organization (WHO) hyperbolically declared “reluctance or refusal to vaccinate” to be one of ten major “global health threats.” What the WHO failed to mention, however, is the preponderant role of “commercial interests”—and especially pharmaceutical industry interests—in shaping its goals and strategies.
Back in 2009, sleight of hand by WHO scientists rebranded the swine flu from “a ‘perfectly ordinary flu’” into a “dangerous pandemic.” This maneuver successfully generated billions in profits for vaccine and anti-flu drug manufacturers; however, the vaccine in question (Pandemrix) caused cases of narcolepsy—many in young people—to surge all over Europe to nearly four times higher than prevaccine levels. In all likelihood, the parents of the narcolepsy-afflicted youth joined the ranks of “ex-vaxxers.” A researcher looking back on the Pandemrix fiasco recently stated:
“If vaccine regulators were serious about safety, the entire vaccine fleet would have been grounded following the Pandemrix narcolepsy disaster, to check for the same mechanism of failure in other vaccines. But nothing of that sort happened….”
Double standards
If consumers want to learn about the potential risks of widely used FDA-approved drugs, they can—with a little legwork—find detailed information on hundreds of drugs on the FDA’s website. For azithromycin, for example, the FDA links to studies showing that the antibiotic increases risks of cancer relapse and cardiovascular problems. A link for fentanyl clearly warns of “the potential for life-threatening harm from accidental exposure” and “deadly” risks to both children and adults. Although it can be an uphill battle to get drugs taken off the market, the ongoing pressure of lawsuits has succeeded in removing some egregious offenders such as Vioxx—and Merck, Vioxx’s manufacturer, has been forced to pay out billions in settlements.
In contrast, consumers who go to the FDA website for risk information about vaccines (classified as “biologics” rather than “drugs”) will search almost in vain, finding sparse information for only four vaccines. One of the four is Gardasil—also manufactured by Merck, and one of the most notoriously dangerous vaccines ever rushed onto the market. While the FDA cautiously states that “concerns have been raised about reports of deaths occurring in individuals after receiving Gardasil,” the agency asserts that “there was not a common pattern to the deaths that would suggest they were caused by the vaccine.” The 2018 book, The HPV Vaccine on Trial, contradicts this benign narrative and describes how Gardasil has caused thousands of perfectly healthy young women and men to “suddenly lose energy, become wheelchair-bound, or even die” while Merck continues to enjoy “soaring revenues.”
For government and the media to dismiss these and other accounts of serious vaccine injuries as insignificant—while falsely labeling injured individuals and their advocates as irresponsible “anti-vaxxers”—is both shameful and insulting. After revealing how the mainstream narrative about Gardasil is riddled with “discrepancies and half-truths,” the authors of The HPV Vaccine on Trial issued a call for greater civility. Noting that marginalization and bullying of the vaccine-injured “destroys civil public discourse and discourages scientific inquiry,” they pointed out that “we urgently need both.”
The point of marketing is not to convince people to buy your stuff. It’s to help you find the people who need your work. Don’t create something for everyone. Create something for someone.
I once saw a conversation between Michael Hyatt and an upset fan.
The fan started complaining about how Michael didn’t really care about people and all he cared about was money. He started to attack how my friend had conducted himself on his blog and podcast. The fan ranted and protested, and as I watched this go down on Twitter, I wondered what Michael might be thinking or feeling. I know what I would’ve been feeling at that point: a strong need to defend myself. However, when I saw Michael’s response I was blown away.
He said quite simply, “I’m not for everyone.”
Did you know that your work is not for everyone?
That is actually the point of it. Most of us get into creative work, whether that’s starting a business or painting a picture or trying to write a book, not because we want to make something for everyone but because we want to make something for someone.
We want to create something that has never been created before. We want to write something that has never been written, not like this, ever. But at some point along the journey, we lose our way. We start to think about who might not like it. And as we consider those who don’t like it, we start to hedge and play it safe. We remove any of the strong language that could potentially lead to people disapproving of it. They might unsubscribe or ask for a refund, we think, so we do whatever we can to avoid any kind of criticism.
But here’s the problem: the kind of work that doesn’t deserve criticism doesn’t deserve praise. Read that again and let it sink in.
The kind of work that doesn’t deserve criticism doesn’t deserve praise.
If you don’t do something worth criticizing, then you aren’t doing something worth appreciating. So as we venture forth to make our things and share them with the world, we have to consider a few questions before we begin.
Who am I not trying to reach?
Before we think about who this work is for, I wonder if it would be a better strategy to consider who this is absolutely not for.
Who is going to disapprove of this?
Who is going to hate it?
In fact, in the “growth hacker” marketing community, thinking about who will absolutely hate this is one way to stir up buzz about the product.
If this thing is not worth hating at least by someone, is it even worth creating?
In a stunning revelation from a 2009 UN document titled “Rethinking the Economic Recovery: A Global Green New Deal“, it is discovered that Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez’ (AOC) Green New Deal is not a new movement of the people, but rather a crafty (and plagiarized) creation of a small group of global elite working through the United Nations.
This 144-page report was headed by Edward B. Barbier, a professor of Economics and Finance at the University of Wyoming at the time, but specifically prepared for the United Nations Environment Programme (UNEP)
It was UNEP that sponsored the infamous 1992 Earth Summit in Rio de Janeiro that catalyzed the doctrine of Sustainable Development and produced the Agenda 21 book labeled The Agenda for the 21st Century. UNEP has been at the root of every intellectually bankrupt scheme to flip the world into its resource-based economic system while driving a fatal nail into Capitalism and Free Enterprise. In my books Technocracy Rising and Technocracy: The Hard Road to World Order, I have extensively documented that Sustainable Development is nothing more than warmed-over Technocracy from the 1930s.
CAP was founded by John Podesta, a prominent member and operative of the Trilateral Commission. Podesta was the principal architect for the U.S. environmental policy for well over 2 decades. He served as Bill Clinton’s Chief of Staff, Special Counselor to Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton’s 2016 Campaign Manager. In July 2002, the UN Secretary-General appointed him to the High-Level Panel On Post-2015 Development Agenda that created the text for the Paris Climate Agreement in 2015.
The Board of Directors for CAP includes Sen. Tom Daschle (Chairman), Stacey Abrams, Donald Sussman, and California billionaire climate activist Tom Steyer.
Peterson Institute for International Economics
PIIE was founded by Peter G. Peterson (1926-2018), a principal member of the Trilateral Commission for decades. PIIE’s Board of Directors is a Who’s Who of the Trilateral Commission and includes Lawrence Summers, C. Fred Bergsten, Richard N. Cooper, Stanley Fischer, Robert Zoellick, Alan Greenspan, Carla A. Hills, George P. Schultz, Paul A. Volcker, and Ernesto Zedillo. The PIIE paper cited by Barbier was A Green Global Recovery? Assessing US Economic Stimulus and the Prospects for International Coordination
Plagiarized: Familiar Language
Echoing AOC’s rhetoric, the Barbier’s UNEP report states,
The multiple crises threatening the world economy today demand the same kind of initiative as shown by Roosevelt’s New Deal in the 1930s, but at the global scale and embracing a wider vision. (p. 5)
Until now, the Green New Deal has been more of an idea than an actual policy. This week, an Ocasio-Cortez resolution is set to make its debut. The plan prioritizes climate change, but its strength lies in its symbolic ties to one of the Democratic party’s biggest historical successes: the original New Deal under President Franklin Delano Roosevelt.
The comparison to Franklin Delano Roosevelt has been prominent from the first day that Ocasio-Cortez became a public figure.
A Christian man who refuses to pay his taxes until the government stops funding abortion has won a historic lawsuit against the IRS.
Michael Bowman has refused to file a tax return or pay taxes since 1999. “I’m not a tax protester. I love my country,” he told reporters. “I have a duty to my country. I have a duty to my conscience.”
Lifesitenews.com reports: The IRS has sent him numerous warnings over unpaid taxes from 2002 to 2014, and in 2012 the Oregon Department of Revenue began garnishing money from Bowman’s bank account. In response, he started cashing out his paychecks and leaving only a minimum balance in his account.
This, federal prosecutors say, constituted “remov[ing] his income from the reach of taxing authorities.” They indicted him for felony tax evasion in the amount of $356,857, as well as four misdemeanor counts of willful failure to file tax returns.
Bowman’s attorney, Matthew Schindler, argued that his client was fully transparent every step of the way, from disclosing all of his paychecks to cashing them at his own bank, under his own name.
“Like a player collapsing as they lose Twister, the government has reached too far forward and stretched way too far back,” his motion to dismiss read.
Last week, US District Judge Michael Mosman sided with Bowman on the felony charge, ruling that the feds failed to show he attempted to conceal income or deceive the government. Prosecutors remain free to re-introduce the charge in the future and are currently weighing whether to do so.
If you believe that liberty is important for the future, you probably wonder how today’s kids are learning about it. You might quiz young children in your life to determine what they know. You could scan their social studies texts to see how liberty is described. Ultimately, you will probably decide you should instruct them about liberty yourself. But how?
Elementary and middle school-aged children are not developmentally ready to debate the border wall, the minimum wage, or the war on drugs. Much of the discussion about liberty that engages adults would confuse or even distress young children. When it concerns liberty, what is appropriate to teach young children? How can it be explained? Can learning about liberty be engaging for five- to twelve-year-olds? As a parent and teacher, these are the questions I pondered. I created the website Kids Learn Liberty to answer them.
If you have ever tried to teach a young child, you know that you must build on the child’s current knowledge one small step at a time. Care must be taken to avoid using words the learner does not comprehend. Since liberty is an abstract concept, children’s grasp of it is strengthened with narratives and hands-on projects. Keeping all that in mind, here is a sample of topics from Kids Learn Liberty.
Coach Them to Distinguish Voluntary from Forced
Children can learn to distinguish between cooperation and coercion. Both involve people interacting. Cooperation is voluntary. Coercion involves threats or actual harm.
Explaining that government generally uses violence to pursue its goals would be unsuitable for young children. It would encourage fear and mistrust. However, children can learn to distinguish between cooperation and coercion. Both involve people interacting. Cooperation is voluntary. Coercion involves threats or actual harm.
After learning about, and hearing examples of, cooperation and coercion, children can listen to the story The Queen of the Frogs by Davide Cali, which explores the issue of rulers vs. ruled, and The Arabolies of Liberty Street, by Sam Swope, which pits the forces of sameness against the joys of individuality. Both will set the stage for thought and discussion about cooperation and coercion.
To make cooperation and coercion more personal, children can write examples of human interactions on index cards and sort them into their proper categories. As world events and family and personal experiences present more examples, these can be added to the deck. When they are ready, children can learn—or better still, figure out for themselves—that most government activities are coercive.
Present Facts Proving that Liberty Is Preferred
The dangers and difficulties of their journeys show the importance of freedom to them.
Immigration is an appropriate and interesting topic for five- to twelve-year-olds. Most immigrants move from less free to more free locations, which demonstrates liberty’s widespread appeal. Kids first need to know what immigration means and that troubles like war, oppression, and poverty are the reasons people relocate. The dangers and difficulties of their journeys show the importance of freedom to them.
Many outstanding children’s books describe immigrant experiences. Some are factual, such as L is for Liberty by Wendy Cheyette Lewison. A chapter book suitable for middle schoolers, Letters from Rifka by Karen Hesse, weaves a compelling narrative about a Russian immigrant girl.
The immigrant experience can be made personal for young children by sharing with them the stories, photos, and heirlooms of their own immigrant ancestors. Children can also visit Meet Young Immigrants on the Scholastic website to hear the words of present-day immigrant children.
Introduce Champions of Liberty
Kids love heroes. Introduce young children to real people who championed liberty. Founders like George Washington and Thomas Jefferson come to mind. Others can be even more powerful.
The beautifully illustrated book Words Set Me Free: The Story of Young Frederick Douglass by Lesa Cline-Ransome will astonish kids as they follow the twisting path Douglass trod to learn how to read. The Picture Book of Harriet Tubman by David Adler conveys the horrors of slavery and the risks people took to escape it. Tubman’s words describing how she felt to be free are breathtaking. Consider also Malala’s Magic Pencil by Malala Yousafzai, a living young person who stood up for her freedom to learn.
Encourage Awareness of Liberty in Action
Something as commonplace as a grocery store produce department abounds with interesting examples of exchange.
Though the mathematics of economic freedom would lull young children to sleep (not a bad thing if you are an exhausted parent), adults can help generate kids’ interest in the economic activity happening around them. Farmers are plowing in their fields. Construction workers are putting up new buildings. Consider taking the children in your life on a tour of a local factory. The tag inside a new pair of sneakers will tell where they were produced. Why not help their new owner find that place on a world map? Trains and delivery vehicles are loaded with products heading to customers. What are they carrying? Where might they be going? Something as commonplace as a grocery store produce department abounds with interesting examples of exchange. Tomatoes from local farms, apples from Washington state, and grapes from Chile are all products of trade.
A surprising number of children’s books have economic freedom as a theme. Some are explicit, such as the classic story “I, Pencil” by Leonard Read. It cleverly describes how, without central direction, many specialists from all over the world work together to produce an everyday object. One Hen by Kate Smith Milway explains how entrepreneurship helped an African community become more prosperous.
Offer Real-Life Examples of Oppression
A powerful way to demonstrate the importance of liberty is to contrast free and unfree countries. Unfortunately, most nonfiction books for young children about nations such as North Korea, Cuba, and Venezuela fail to explain the oppression and privation suffered by their citizens. Stories about developing nations focus on the ways that children all over the world are alike. Though this is good for nurturing understanding, getting children from wealthy countries to make the connection between liberty and lifestyle will probably require explanation.
The story The Water Princess by Susan Verde describes a young African girl’s daily walks to obtain water for drinking and washing. Children with indoor plumbing will benefit from hearing that dependable tap water is a benefit of living in a free and prosperous community. Narratives are what make the realities of lack of freedom come to life. For example, truthful stories about life in North Korea (N is for North Korea by Trevor Eissler) and Afghanistan (Nasreen’s Secret School by Jeanette Winter) describe the lives of oppressed children.
Hearing explanations, reading powerful narratives, and making personal connections will help young children comprehend and appreciate liberty. Then they will be better prepared for the onslaught of historic and political perspectives they will encounter in high school and beyond. The best way to preserve liberty for posterity is to make sure that those going into the future understand its importance.
For more concepts, dozens of literature suggestions, plus links and family activities for teaching liberty to children, go to the website kidslearnliberty.com.
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The body of a Korean man who died in Mexico was returned to his wife ‘without brain, stomach and heart.’ His widow is now petitioning authorities to return her husband’s organs.
The 35-year-old (known only as Mr Kim) leaves behind two children and a wife, who claims there was nothing natural about her husband’s cause of death.
After Mr Kim’s body was flown back to his family in South Korea “without brain, stomach and heart”, his wife claims the father-of-two was involved in a fight before he died.
THE REAL STORY
She claims he was involved in an altercation at a karaoke bar in Monterrey on the day he died. According to Mrs Kim, her unconscious husband was rushed to hospital the night of January 3, where he was later pronounced dead. All of this was allegedly caught on CCTV.
Her fears of a cover-up were amplified when she demanded a second autopsy be performed on January 21 by the Korean National Forensic Service.
A forensic scientist told her there were signs of external injury and bruising on her husband’s body. He was also missing his brain and stomach. The NFS could not determine the cause of his death due to the missing organs.
“More than a week later, I received the autopsy result that says ‘no external injuries.’ I was dumbfounded,” Mrs. Kim wrote on the Cheong Wa Dae website, where she has launched an online petition.
She claims Mexican police were not investigating her husband’s death because on paper, dying of natural causes was not suspicious.
FIGHT FOR JUSTICE
Mrs Kim is now demanding Mexican authorities return her husband’s organs. “My husband was a citizen of Korea. His three-year-old son and 11-month-old daughter have lost their father,” she wrote. “Please help me and help my husband.”
Since January 22, the petition has garnered more than 17,500 signatures.
KBS World Radio has confirmed the Ministry of Foreign Affairs in South Korea has also asked Mexican authorities to return the missing organs, which are believed to be at the Servicio Medico Forense (Forensic Medical Service).
Few of the precious liberties so loudly decried as “Stolen!” are taken without consent. Most often, the responsible party’s name can be read aloud from the signature line of a contract. Such contracts spell out in explicit detail the terms in which the signatory’s liberties were voluntarily surrendered.
The three largest debt-contracts are the mortgage, car loan, and student loan.
Renting, driving a used car, and getting a degree online, are superior alternatives to the traditional debt-contract solutions. By deploying them, and paying cash for everything else, you’ll enjoy more liberty than the masters who sell debt-contracts as products to formalize the slavery of those who sign them.
Three Upgrades and Emancipation, Too
What’s better? To not be a slave, or to live better than the masters who seek to enslave you?
1 —Better Housing
The best second home is a hotel room anywhere you want to be. The best first home is a rental. Renters:
May live anywhere they want.
Can move at a moments notice.
Are not responsible for maintenance.
Don’t have to insure or replace what they don’t own.
If you have the cash, keep that 42% in your pocket or buy a better version of a 3-year-old car that someone else bought new. If you don’t have the cash, then save up to buy a four-year-old car for 49% of its original purchase price, or a five-year-old car for 60% off!
Better still, if you’re renting (see #1) move close to work where you don’t need a car for transportation.
3 — Better Education
If a college degree is good, then getting one twice as fast at 1/10th the cost is excellent. Or, get two online degrees in the usual four years for 20% of the cost of one. Or, get your bachelors and masters degree in four years for 90% off of each!
Best education of all: homeschool, GED out of high-school, get a degree (or two) online, figure out your purpose(s) in life and become an apprentice of some real-world masters. You’ll be engaged with life, in your teens, in ways your peers won’t be until their 40’s, if ever. You’ll even have a few degrees to show the weenies who think education is a membership rather than a transformation.
Delayed Gratification?
If you want to work a few decades in slavery, then the debt-free alternatives in this article would delay your gratification, forever.
If, however, you’d prefer to live fully engaged in your highest purposes the solutions in this article are light-speed travel in comparison with the norm.
Pay Cash or Don’t Buy
The solutions to the three largest debt-contracts come from a five-word rule-of-thumb principle: Pay cash, or don’t buy. By following this rule-of-thumb, all debt contracts are avoided, including the three largest described in the first solution.
Debt-Contracts are Products
Debt-contracts are not the cause of slavery. They’re products created to address the shortcomings of ignorance and a lack of determination to remain debt-free.
The Slave’s Problems are The Master’s Solutions (And Products)
Those who buy debt-contracts purchase their own slavery. The slave’s problems are the master’s solutions. They’re sold to the debtor to shortcut the personal development required to remain at liberty.
Liberty is purchased at the expense of the acquisition of knowledge of the debt-free alternatives to all such mechanisms of slavery.
Do you not know that, if you present yourselves to anyone as an obedient slave, you are a slave of the one whom you obey? — Romans 6:16
In a world of information overload, whoever appears to be the most reasonable can influence or control the overloaded.
There’s no historical precedent for the amount of information the average person has at their fingertips, today. Anyone with a phone can bring libraries of information to bear on each and every decision.
But information is not knowledge. And knowledge is not wisdom. Without wisdom, it’s hard to tell what information applies to which decision.
This challenge, to the average person, is an opportunity for:
Those who would seek to influence.
Those who would seek to control.
Influence vs. Control
Whether influence is good or bad can only be determined by context and discernment. For now, I’ll confine “influence” to that with no destructive intent.
Control, on the other hand, is the desire to obtain consent for the purpose of domination. I’ll explain why consent is necessary, later in this article.
How can you tell whether someone is seeking benevolent influence or destructive control?
Those Seeking Influence …
… behave like vendors in a marketplace. They present the pros and cons of an idea or product and leave you to decide for yourself.
Those Seeking Control …
… bully, rather than inform or persuade. For example, any one of Schopenhauer’s 38 stratagems might be used to give the appearance of being right; with little or no interest in actually being right:
The Extension (Dana’s Law)
The Homonymy
Generalize Your Opponent’s Specific Statements
Conceal Your Game
False Propositions
Postulate What Has to Be Proved
Yield Admissions Through Questions
Make Your Opponent Angry
Questions in Detouring Order
Take Advantage of the Nay-Sayer
Generalize Admissions of Specific Cases
Choose Metaphors Favourable to Your Proposition
Agree to Reject the Counter-Proposition
Claim Victory Despite Defeat
Use Seemingly Absurd Propositions
Arguments Ad Hominem
Defense Through Subtle Distinction
Interrupt, Break, Divert the Dispute
Generalize the Matter, Then Argue Against it
Draw Conclusions Yourself
Meet Him With a Counter-Argument as Bad as His
Petitio principii
Make Him Exaggerate His Statement
State a False Syllogism
Find One Instance to the Contrary
Turn the Tables
Anger Indicates a Weak Point
Persuade the Audience, Not the Opponent
Diversion
Appeal to Authority Rather Than Reason
This Is Beyond Me
Put His Thesis into Some Odious Category
It Applies in Theory, but Not in Practice
Don’t Let Him Off the Hook
Will Is More Effective Than Insight
Bewilder Your opponent by Mere Bombast
A Faulty Proof Refutes His Whole Position
Become Personal, Insulting, Rude (argumentum ad personam)
Personal Favorites
Declaring as “over”, debates that have hardly begun.
Declaring as “debunked”, valid concerns yet to be addressed.
Declaring as “discredited”, persons of integrity.
Declaring as “concluded”, discussions that have hardly begun.
Threats in lieu of persuasion.
Imposing artificial deadlines for a decision.
Declaring that “everybody does it” while providing no specific examples.
All of the above are attempts to deceive, rather than inform or persuade.
The Debate is Over!
Whenever I hear someone say, “The debate is over”, I know an end has been pronounced by someone desperate to avoid a beginning. I also know that the one making the pronouncement has made an investment, either monetary or emotional, that debate would put in jeopardy.
Global/Climate (Cooling | Warming | Change)
The first time I heard the phrase “Global Cooling” was in a sentence declaring the debate about it to be over. The phrase was then changed to “Global Warming” in the same sentence declaring that debate to be over, as well.
Finally, the phrase was changed to something for which no debate is necessary: “Climate Change”. Indeed, climate is 100% guaranteed to change, forever!
The debate is over on a lot of things: ocean waves, morning dew, childish innocence. If the debate about something is declared to be over before it’s even begun, the one making the declaration has something to hide.
The Information Advantage
Due to the amount of information available, those who seek control must compete in the “marketplace” of ideas. They must not only to appear reasonable, but the most reasonable among competing alternatives. This “most reasonable” appearance must persist for as long as it takes to obtain a lasting form of control. The best of these is a binding contract, either signed or opted into.
Consent is Required for Lasting Control
Without consent, control is temporary. It lasts only as long as you remain fooled.
With consent, however, control lasts for the length of the contract.
The Jurisdiction of Reasonableness
Mere opinions, and the bullying tactics used to get them accepted, don’t matter unless there’s a valuable jurisdiction to be gained, and a judge to decide who gains them.
Those who don’t seek control rarely think about things like jurisdictions and judges. Those who do seek control, however, think about little else. They spend most of their time campaigning for appointment, by you, to be a judge in one of the most important jurisdictions of all: your mind.
Your mind is not only a jurisdiction, but the deciding jurisdiction of all others.
Agreement Types
Contractual opt-ins are becoming more and more subtle. For example, the mere breaking of a plastic seal on the box for a TV or appliance, is the opt-in for many EULAs (End-User License Agreements).
Still, an actual signature “on the dotted line” of a contract is the best legal mechanism of control.
The Debt-Contract Example
Only a handful of contracts, spread across the 7 Matters of Life, are needed to control most aspects of life. Three debt-contracts illustrate the point:
Student loans — 10 Years.
Car Loan — 5 Years.
Mortgage — 30 Years.
One of these three contracts enslaves a large percentage of the world. To avoid that fate, consider two questions, before signing one of them:
Are you fully aware of the educational, transportation, or housing alternatives that would fill these needs without going into debt?
Do you not know that, if you present yourselves to anyone as an obedient slave, you are a slave of the one whom you obey? (Romans 6:16)
Most liberties are not “lost” or “stolen”. They are surrendered, voluntarily, through legal contracts. It’s worth understanding some legal terms around such contracts.
To bear witness v. — To solemnly assert something, offering firsthand authentication of the fact; often concerning grave or important matters.
Truth (quality) n. — Conformity to reality or actuality; often with the implication of dependability.
Message — truth n. — A message that conforms to reality or actuality; whether historical (in space and time) or supernatural.
The Usual Campaign Sequence
The campaign to become an appointed judge in the jurisdiction of your mind follows a usual sequence. Think of it as a sales pitch, because that’s what it is.
I am the most reasonable and provide the best options.
You are less reasonable with limited options.
“Those who love the truth hear my voice”1, and sign my contract.
Conclusion
Your mind is the deciding jurisdiction of all others, and you are its primary judge. The cost of retaining this position is choosing the highest source of truth, exploring all options available, and solving problems with a commitment to remain debt-free.
Pay whatever cost necessary to remain the primary judge of the jurisdiction of your mind. If you forfeit that position, all that isn’t immediately lost, is exposed to loss.
In a world of information overload, whoever appears to be the most reasonable can influence or control the overloaded.
It’s a shame to see people, who believe (or might believe) in the supernatural, engage in pointless arguments. Even more pointless is talking about it, at all, with those whose beliefs are confined to the limits of the five senses.
For the skeptic, new inventions must bring the invisible within range of the five senses. Only then are they “free to believe” in anything invisible. Prior to the microscope, the skeptic would have reported you to the looney bin for your “outrageous” belief in the microscopic. After the microscope, the skeptic thinks it was your sanity that was restored by the invention, not theirs!
Separating Skeptics from Cynics
This is the sort of “progress” the skeptic is limited to unless they take a “leap of faith”. Fortunately, for the skeptic, that leap is possible. If presented with sufficient evidence, skeptics can be jarred into a reluctant admission that invisible things exist. The cynic, on the other hand, will remain unfazed by any evidence put in front of them.
Miracles, Defined
A miracle is a natural event with a supernatural cause.1
In other words, miracles look, sound, feel, smell, taste … normal. Their appearance is natural, their cause is invisible. So, where does that leave us with separating skeptics and cynics?
It leaves us where C.S. Lewis arrived a long time ago:
C.S. Lewis on Cynics
… the question whether miracles occur can never be answered simply by experience. Every event which might claim to be a miracle is, in the last resort, something presented to our senses, something seen, heard, touched, smelled, or tasted. And our senses are not infallible. If anything extraordinary seems to have happened, we can always say that we have been the victims of an illusion. If we hold a philosophy which excludes the supernatural, this is what we always shall say. What we learn from experience depends on the kind of philosophy we bring to experience. It is therefore useless to appeal to experience before we have settled, as well as we can, the philosophical question.2
The skeptics “philosophy” is, “I’ll believe it when I see it”. The cynic’s “settled philosophy” is the supernatural does not exist, regardless of what is seen.
Skeptics are worth your time; cynics are not.
Prisoners of Time
Both skeptics, and cynics, are limited by the detection devices of their day. To them, everything discovered is obvious, and that which is yet to be discovered, is fantasy. Bring evidence in front of their senses and you’re being “reasonable”. Otherwise, the matter is closed to all but the “unreasonable”.
The reasonable man adapts himself to the world; the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore all progress depends on the unreasonable man.3
Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.
The price of such “reasonableness” is imprisonment within the limits of their era. They are, for the same reasons, prisoners of science.
Prisoners of Science
Much of what’s left for mankind to discover is beyond the range of the five senses. Without access to an electron microscope, for example, you won’t be able to “see” much of anything in such areas of discovery. So, what do you do?
You’ll need a mediator between the known and the newly discovered; between what’s true or false, and the newly discovered to be true or false. What do you call someone who functions as a mediator between visible and invisible things?
They’re called priests. But the skeptic will use a different word for the same role: scientist.
Those who won’t contemplate the supernatural need no priest to interpret scripture. They do, however, need a mediator between themselves and nature.
As the frontiers of human knowledge push beyond the ability of the five senses to perceive, skeptics and cynics need their “priests” to be told what’s real, and what’s not real, more than ever.
The Secular Priesthood
And so, scientists have been promoted into a secular priesthood. They are the “reasonable”, and therefore trusted, mediators between what exists and what doesn’t; between what is true and false; and what is, therefore, deemed reasonable and unreasonable.
Who cares what scientists do as long as the remote control (invisible infrared beam) changes the channel of the TV?!
If that were as far as it went, there’d be reason only to celebrate. When mankind is working hard, and using the fruits of their labor to serve mankind, then everything is just dandy!
Unfortunately, Reality is not as simple, nor as benevolent, as all that.
And their ‘church’
Scientists, like priests, are not in charge. They serve their parishes, and report to their bishops, cardinals, and pope. The scientists know them as customers, labs, foundation administrators and benefactors. Can we depend on the good-spirited benevolence of this organization?
Unfortunately, we can barely trust the formal clergy, who’ve taken public vows to be Holy and good, pledging loyalty to only their Creator.
Whether we like it or not, scientists are becoming more widely-accepted as mediators between the seen and unseen realms, than priests. And though science has no purview on philosophical or theological matters, scientists and priests are two kinds of priesthoods, pitted against one another.
Priests Travel Faster
The frontiers of human discovery have pushed out of pandora’s visible box and into invisible realms. Because of this, scientists may feel like they’ve finally arrived at the big game.
But, wherever a scientist may go, his arrival will always be preceded by either a priest or a poet. These travel faster than light; at the speed of thought. They do that by combining story with imagination. And while scientists may work on practical discoveries beyond the visible (finally!), priests and poets have been contemplating “the beyond” since the dawn of humanity.
Conflict? What Conflict?
Personally, I see no conflict, whatsoever, between science and faith. Science explores and quantifies the world as the Creator has turned it over for exploration. I thank God for every discovery and invention! So far, every source I’ve investigated, claiming a conflict between science and faith, has been one side, or the other, arguing past one another. Those who’ve thought through the roles of science and faith are left with nothing but the progress of each to celebrate!
Headline News of Devils, Demons, Witches, Robots, ETs, Exorcists, AI & Terror Threats
… And that’s just in one day! Here’s a snapshot of the drudge report headlines on the night of March 2, 2017, ~8 pm.
7 Questions for Mommy & Daddy
I have an 8-year-old son who reads well, now. I know the following questions could easily be put to a parent whose child is looking over their shoulder and reading the news headlines, above:
What’s an exorcist?
Do witches really cast spells?
Is the devil real?
What’s the difference between Satan and the Devil?
Why did they murder someone for a demon?
Do people come from God or are they grown in a lab?
Are there really ETs or was that just a movie?
What are the answers to those questions, mommy and daddy?
If you’re a skeptic or cynic about the supernatural, that’s fine. Coming from your child, then, what’s your answer to this question:
If the supernatural does not exist, why is it all over the news?
Hollywood, Game Developers, or You?
A worldview without a handle on Realities beyond the limits of the five senses, is so incomplete it leaves one unable to even discuss the news. I would prefer to lead such conversations with my children, not merely keep up, or react to the news.
When introducing a book called “The Unseen Realm”, and its more easily read version “Supernatural”, to friends, I say that, if we (parents) don’t teach our children about the supernatural then 20-something game programmers, and Hollywood screenwriters, will gladly fill in the gaps.
I would prefer to teach my children what I believe to be the truth about the supernatural aspects of the world. I don’t want it to come from the imagination of a screenwriter or game developer. And, I don’t want it to come from the imagination of a paperback writer who’s decided that vampires or demons are “Hot” subjects, right now.
My 8-year-old has me gasping for breadth (pun intended) with his questions. It’s astounding how discerning, and naturally oriented towards the supernatural, children are. If you have kids, you already know this. If you don’t, just watch one for 5 minutes. Your world may be limited by what you can see. But, their world isn’t.
More than Child’s Play
Discussing the supernatural is more than child’s play.
“In the contemporary world where there is a strong current of postmodern relativism…many people are far more interested in their own feelings, or what “works for them”, than in the question of what is actually true. But there is a price to be paid for rejecting the truth.”4
End of Part 1
Attributions
Main Article Photo by Felipe Posada, The Invisible Realm, Toy Boat
Creative Commons “Attribution-NonCommercial”
Victorious warriors win first and then go to war, while defeated warriors go to war first and then seek to win.1
A recent conversation with a friend (who wants to start a Martial Arts studio) inspired me to revisit the topic of business vetting. The questions in this article were inspired by our conversation. What better place for a “victorious warrior to win first and then go to war…” than in vetting the business of a martial arts studio?!
The High-Paying Activities of Business Vetting & Negotiation
Negotiating is one of the highest paying activities if the return is measured by the time spent negotiating. Higher still is the activity of business vetting. The stakes are, by definition, higher than any deal the business will ever do. After all, no money can be made (or lost) in a business that doesn’t exist.
What’s at stake when vetting a business, however, is far more than money. People invest a large portion of their lives into a business to make it successful. If the time & money invested doesn’t lead to a return, or leaves them in debt, then it would have been far better to have not started the business, at all.
I’m big fan of acquiring the skill of business vetting.
Shark Tank
One of my wife’s favorite shows is “Shark Tank”. We often get drawn into vetting business ideas when watching that show. I wrote How to Vet a Business Idea in 10 Minutes to express my thoughts on the subject and make a reference that might help others.
Business Vetting is Space-Time Travel
Do you think I’m exaggerating by saying business vetting is a form of space-time travel? If so, I beg to differ. If you don’t take it that seriously then you’re in danger of losing large chucks of time and money. The stakes of either a “Go” or “No-Go” decision are immense. The mission, if you choose to accept it, involves:
Deep consideration of the experiences of others.
Knowledge of location and service.
Intimate knowledge of self.
Keeping all these factors, and more, in mind, around a business that doesn’t yet exist, is serious mind-work. Li Ch`uan sums it up, as follows:
Given a knowledge of three things—the affairs of men, the seasons of heaven and the natural advantages of earth—, victory will invariably crown your battles.1
Martial Arts Studio – Questions, Factors, Mentors & Ideas
Subject expertise is only a starting point in creating and running a business around that expertise. I have no expertise in the Martial Arts or the studios in which they’re taught. Someone with expertise could make a better list. But, they wouldn’t make a better list without placing a high value on business vetting and letting go of their fears of exploring the unknowns.
Pedigree
Dojo’s seriously value their pedigree. Who started the art? What inspired them? What problem were they trying to solve? What is their philosophy? Who were their first students? Then the same questions start over, again, with the first students and the next.
Certifications & Organizations
Organizations to become member of?
Do members typically make a profit?
Mentor sign-off/Certification?
Entity Choice?
Tools: Studio equipment, posters, mats, props, safety, uniform suggestions, patch design, belt systems, belt requirements, rate of progress?, web site formats/info, accounting programs, taxe, entity choice?
Location
What factors do successful studios consider before choosing a location?
What factors would successful studios have considered if they could relocate?
Students
What is the expected # of students per population size of the city?
What is the needed # of students needed to pay for average expenses?
What is the average age range of students that make a long-term commitment to the art?
Mentor Modeling of …
When vetting a business, the ideal is to find a real-life mentor who’s “been there before”. If you find one, do whatever it takes to spend time with them. Take your potential business out for a virtual walk by asking them about theirs. Every word out of their mouths is pure gold. The mission is to Simulate Virtual Failure (To avoid actual failure).
Fees?
Schedules?
Number of Instructors needed per students served by studio?
Do you pay advanced students to handle instructor overflow?
How Much?
Seasonal Considerations?
Private Lessons
Offered?
Price?
Schedule?
What’s your day/week/month/year like?
What do you wish you had done (that I could do, now)?
What are you about to try (that I could also try)?
Profit expectations per location?
What obstacles were crucial to overcome to breakthrough to success or smooth operations?
What are common obstacles that have taken down other MA operations (That I could start planning to overcome, now)?
The Ideal Time to Fail, and to Succeed
The ideal time for a business to fail is before it starts. That is, before time and money (or fortunes) have been invested that may never be recouped. Ironically, as captured in the Sun Tzu quote at the beginning of this article, the ideal time for a business to succeed is also before it has started.
The “enemy”, for business vetting purposes, is any factor, external or internal, that would cause the business to fail, or become unsustainable. Would you prefer to subdue your enemies after they surprise you or before they even know there’s a war?
For to win one hundred victories in one hundred battles is not the acme of skill. To subdue the enemy without fighting is the acme of skill.1
There’s so much to running a business that owners must subdue most “enemies” without fighting. Otherwise, they’ll be fighting all day. A Martial Arts studio, especially, ought to save the fighting for the mats.
Try to Talk Yourself Out of It
Entrepreneurs are naturally optimistic. To counterbalance this natural demeanor, try talking yourself out of the business you’re vetting, instead of into it.
If you can talk yourself out of a business idea, then you should. Doing that, gracefully and thoroughly, is what How to Vet a Business Idea in 10 Minutes is meant to accomplish. As my friend, David, used to say:
If you want to be a writer, then don’t. If you have to be a writer, then good luck to you.
Successful Vetting ‘Failures’
I have no idea if a Martial Arts studio is a good business or not. In this section, I’m not speculating, either way. I’m merely offering an example of what a successful vetting “failure” might look like.
What if my friend gets to the end (or middle) of vetting her business and realizes that running her own studio is not going to work? Maybe it won’t pay for itself, won’t make enough of a profit, would require 70-hours-a-week, or that she’s got the right idea for the wrong location, etc. Would that mean she’s, somehow, failed?
Not, at all! She could then redirect maximum effort and resources back into her passion for the Martial Arts. She’d only be able to do that with resources that weren’t lost (on a business that wouldn’t have succeeded, anyway). One of the worst possible outcomes of a failed business is to leave the owner, not only drained of money and energy, but drained of passion for the service, or product, that made them want to start a business in the first place!
If a Martial Arts studio is a “No-Go” for her location then perhaps her “Go” would be to switch gears to offering private lessons, only. Perhaps those private lessons could be made available only to exclusive clients who would pay more for her time. Maybe there’s a resort in her area that would love to have a Martial Arts teacher on tap to teach high-paying classes to guests. If a studio-sized operation won’t break-even, or make a profit, then she’ll be making more profit on her first private lesson than she would have made by running an entire studio!
Passion vs. Business Forms of Expression
I believe all non-destructive passions are good. And yet, where the application of our passions may fit into a business is not always obvious, or conventional. One of the best payoffs of good business vetting is the preservation of our passions so they may be optimally applied, later. The conventional application of well-known passions or talents, may have little or nothing to do with what makes money. It may also have little or nothing to do with their optimal deployment. We should indulge our passions, anyway. Develop them, and enjoy them, while vetting business ideas that may lead to their optimal deployment.
100 to 1
Be willing to get to the end of a hundred business ideas that never start because they can’t succeed. Only then will you have the full confidence and resources to fully engage in a business, around your passion, that will.
“If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles. If you know yourself but not the enemy, for every victory gained you will also suffer a defeat.”1
Yep, that Sun Tzu dude knew what he was talking about!
Grandma GG died on the twelfth day of Christmas, 2017.
In Catholic tradition, the following day is the Epiphany, the feast of the three kings, commemorating the manifestation of Christ to the Magi. So, the original “12 Days” are not a children’s memory and forfeit game turned into a Christmas carol.
And yet, when a friend reminded me of the day, the first memory I had was of Timothy and Lucas singing that song in the shower of our ski lodge hotel, over the holiday. If there’s anything more beautiful than the sound of children singing it’s the sound of my children singing.
When we drove home, Timothy had the gifts of each day of the song memorized. Then, like my father did so many times, I changed things around on them. To show the boys they’re not stuck with the official version of things, I made up new gifts for the first four days and sang a new carol.
By the time we were done, our version had 12 strummers strumming, three french breads, two lady bugs, and a fish swimming in a glass jar.
Charlie’s Option ‘C’
It was a small change to a lovely song. But, small changes like that, initiated by my father, were at the core of why he and mom lived such an extraordinary life. The conventional was just one possible starting point for my father; a brilliant engineer certain that no one had the whole game figured out. As he would often say, that made running with the herd a most dangerous proposition.
As my cousin Keith put it, if there were options A and B for everyone else, my father had an option C to consider. Tell him that there’s two sides to every coin and he’d probably smile and point out that you missed the third side. You forget about the edge. That’s technically a third side.
I can just hear him saying, “Remember, Terry, nobody’s got the whole game figured out. The instant someone tells you they do, ‘Run!’.”
And yet, for all his insights, when visiting with them in Tokyo my father said the reason they were able to travel everywhere and do such fun things was because of my mom. He just went to work every day, as usual. Mom took care of the blizzard of details it took the relocate, setup another house, figure out the local markets, and pay the bills.
The Shenanigans Continue …
The Shenanigans of the Gillespie’s, the McNally’s, and now the Arbelaez’, continue with the next generation. We sing the beautiful songs given us with the audacity to change the lyrics. The melody eventually goes, too, and the composers are forgotten. New life sings its own version of ancient songs. And nothing but the Grace of God is so assured that it should be immune from re-examination or re-canted with the joy of a personal imprint.
In Everything I Do
I must study politics and war that my sons may have liberty to study mathematics and philosophy. My sons ought to study mathematics and philosophy… in order to give their children a right to study painting, poetry, music, architecture…1
And so it was that my brother and I were able to study music and architecture. Everything I do is on the shoulders of my parents, and on my knees, for the glory of our Father in heaven. The sacrifices they made, and the small changes to the norm my dad would always make, compounded into an enveloping blanket of possibilities my brother and I had the luxury of taking for granted.
An Artful Life
Possibilities are the breeding ground of creativity. The fruit of creativity is an artful life and, hopefully, the appreciation of the liberties that make it possible.
My parents were always there to help. Only because I was so sure of that, did I rarely need it. It was a premise in our relationship and bestowed a freedom to compose an extraordinary life. May the compositions of Isabel and I be a worthy extension of their legacy.
The Highest Privilege
When friends used to ask about my childhood I didn’t know what to say. What’s the opposite of a shitty childhood? Whatever that is, that was us.
Such discussions now involve notions of privilege and what that might be. From my parents, I know the answer: the highest earthly privilege, of all, is to be born into a household with a loving father and mother.
I can’t say it enough, and can’t stop thinking it: everything I do only makes sense when viewed as an extension of them. While others may try to discard their heritage, or apologize for it, I will spend the rest of my life being thankful for, and exploring the depths of, my own.
Geraldine Marie Gillespie
An excellent wife who can find?
She is far more precious than jewels.
The heart of her husband trusts in her,
and he will have no lack of gain.
She does him good, and not harm,
all the days of her life.2
My father found this in my mother, Geraldine Marie Gillespie. And because their lives reflected its importance, I eventually found the same in Isabel. So, Isabel was the perfect one to give my mother her most favorite title of all: Grandma GG.
It was a name quickly conjured to avoid confusion with Martha, the other grandmother living in our house at the time. And, though the role of grandmother is rarely exceeded in stature or importance, it was a role my mother never expected to play. But, as I was to learn in the hours after her death, there was even more than that bundled up into Grandma GG’s favorite title.
A Catatonic Epiphany
For the last three years of her life, I’d prayed to know the purpose of my mother’s increased suffering, being confined to a bed for the past 10 years, and even losing her words.
Then, as befitting the 12th day of Christmas, I was lead on the track of a catatonic epiphany to a small group meeting at our church. Perhaps only around other believers could something as heart-warming, yet terrifying, be revealed: that my mother’s highest purposes in life were identical to her work, which was, in turn, identical to her highest calling. All three of these cherished insights lined up into one for Grandma GG. Her purposes, work, and calling were, all three, the same. They were inextricably bound up, and poured into, her three great loves: my father, my brother, and me.
The rareness of all three of these lining up —something that perhaps only a wife and mother of her time were afforded — is partly why I missed them.
A Mother’s Grief
Seen from that vantage point, it became more understandable that she had the strokes that put her in the bed shortly after my father, and then brother, died. Two-thirds of her life purposes had just left the planet. Her husband and firstborn son, were gone.
For those who haven’t walked that path, there’s no way to comprehend the loss. What I know of it are from the sounds of her weeping over my brother; cries I’d often wished could become unheard as they resonated through every dimension in a way that only a mother’s grief could.
Mom held on, in part, to save me from what she felt that day. She couldn’t bear for the same to happen to me.
A Secret Project
Maybe every child has a feeling their parents are working on a secret project that’s never revealed or talked about. You know they’re up to something; you just don’t know what it is. Then, one day, you realize that the secret project they’ve been working on, all this time, is you.
Every grocery bag, pair of sneakers, uniform, piano lesson, field trip, monthly check for Catholic school … and every drop-off and pick-up and late-night vigil waiting for you to come home, is one more stitch in the patchwork of a quilt they’re making, but don’t expect to use, for their own warmth. They’re sowing the soil, and tending to trees for decades, in hopes that it will bear the most delicious fruit the world has ever seen. And yet they’re perfectly content to die having never taken a bite.
The Unbearable Absence of Reservation
We pour ourselves out for our children, not because they’ve earned it, but because our love for them comes with an almost unbearable absence of reservation. It’s the only fitting metaphor we have of God’s love for us.
What Christ did for all, we seek to do for our children, within the realms of our limited authority: To guide them away from error and onto the path of their most complete fruition. And when they fall short, to plead forgiveness for their youthful trespasses and cancel any records of debt that might stand against them with legal demands.
Charlie’s 10% Solution
My dad said their marriage worked because he put 10% of everything he had into it. My mom wholeheartedly agreed with him on that, adding that the other 90% came from her.
A New Plague
The late 70’s were a tough time for my parent’s marriage. A new legal option of No-fault divorce was creeping across the country like a plague, leaving broken families in its wake. The machinery of separation was put into motion with a 9-syllable incantation: “ir·rec·on·cil·a·ble dif·fer·ences” were not corporate mergers gone awry, but a legal pretense for parents to live in separate houses.
Neutrality & Fairness
I remember my mom saying they couldn’t handle being Switzerland with all the couples they’d known who’d become separate and warring nations; the kids pulled around new artificial zones that, unlike the Vietnam news stories on TV, were anything but demilitarized.
So, there were arguments, and dishes thrown, and frustrations we felt, but didn’t understand. That’s how my brother and I knew that, just because we were born into it, didn’t make our parent’s marriage a guarantee.
We also learned that people playing fair with each other was a recipe for disaster; that it took a lot more than mere fairness to be happy. Only when they became resigned to giving more than received did a peace, that surpasses all understanding, come to our house.
Wedding Song
As sung in the wedding folk song, popular at the time:
Woman draws her life from man and gives it back again.
But, the circle of the exchange in those lyrics spins faster than the inputs of the wedded couple. It’s that invisible extra energy the songwriter is asking about in the question, “Do you believe in something, that you’ve never seen before?”.
Grief is the Precious, Cut Short
I’ve learned from the deaths of my immediate family that the greatest cause for grief is when something precious is cut short of its expected completeness. And though I grieve for my mother, and still for my father and brother, I’m unable to view their lives as having been cut short; each for their own reasons.
Dad’s Bucket List(s)
In a conversation with my dad, a year before he died, he told me that when he was 10-years-old he made a list of things he’d dreamed of doing. By his mid-40’s he’d gotten to the end of that list, and made another. By the time of our conversation, he said he’d checked everything off that second list, as well.
The memory of that exchange was particularly comforting when he died, unexpectedly, a year later. How could his life be viewed as having been cut short if, by his own handwritten lists, he’d completed everything he’d set out to do?
Uncle Tim
When my dad’s brother came to visit, last year, I told him that story. He said he felt the same way and that his number was 75. Seven months later, nine days after Grandma GG, my Uncle Tim met his number.
Mom’s Unexpected Life
As for my mother, she never expected to get to do most of the things she, and my father, did. She raised two boys, traveled the world, got her high school diploma (about the same time we did), worked for a while to see what that was like, learned ikebana painting with the Japanese, and played golf with my father to her hearts content in their dream home, designed by their son, on the 5th hole of a private golf course in South Carolina. All of this, with her husband who’d retired at the age of 53.
It wasn’t until after my father died that I realized that Grandma GG was another artist in the family. Her opinions on logos, and colors, and ideas for business names, were always refreshing. And the grandchildren on her lap were the vitamins she took for her last eight years.
The fullness of Grandma GG’s life is the license we have to limit our grief to that of a life, not cut short, but fully lived.
Death ≠ Life Incomplete
A life is not devoid of purpose, nor incomplete, due merely to the fact that it has ended. If that were so, there is no hope for any of us, nor has there ever been.
I know this is not so, if only because of the memories I draw from them. My father may have helped me make more decisions, after his death, than before it. And though I believe it to be a mere fractal of a larger truth, there’s an undeniable life continued, here and now, in our memories, alone.
They Don’t Feel Gone
Staring at the bed of all the photos of my family it doesn’t make sense that they’re all gone. They don’t feel gone. After another series a fleeting moments, Isabel and my photos will be added to the pile. Then, it will be Timothy and Lucas staring at our pictures with this same odd feeling.
Memory is Proof of Life
Among the dead are those whose memories and past deeds are still having more of an impact on my life, today, than anyone currently living, ever will. So, the separation of who is here, and who is gone, becomes a more ambiguous proposition with each passing year.
After all, if memory of the once living is of no importance, then why punish a murderer? The victim’s gone and justice won’t bring them back. But, murderers are punished because the living will not put their memories away. The bell of the victims life will not be un-rung. And neither will the absence of justice be forgotten, or un-factored in to the righteous behavior of the survivors.
I believe the soul is sanctified by the Holy Spirit, and continues a new life in the unseen realm, as the body falls away. Still, unbelievers can take comfort in the memories of loved ones who’ve died, and the life contained in their memory of them.
In the first few years, not a day went by without a citation of the fourth commandment, in one direction or another. We eventually got the hang of it in seeing the final years of Grandma GG’s life through. Her care was part of our purpose, while she was in the final stages of completing hers. We were like mirrors pointed at each other, each unaware of the reflections compounding into infinity.
Through the Eyes of Visitors
But, our children, and others, saw those reflections.
Every once in a while we’d get an outside perspective on our lives, through the eyes of visitors. It was like having a puppy and a friend stops by, two months later, and breaks the news to you that what you’re calling a puppy has become a dog.
As friends and family passed on condolences, one of the first things they’d say is how wonderful it was that Grandma GG spent her final years with her family.
They’re right, it was wonderful. But, it was just as wonderful to spend the long beginning of my life, with her.
End of the Rainbow
In retrospect, the struggles I had in caring for my mom were like a man complaining about a rock in his shoe while walking to the end of a rainbow. The treasure, waiting to be collected, is more than one house can hold. Part of that treasure is the proof that Grandma GG’s highest calling was met, so that even 1/3rd of its fulfillment was more than enough to reap for the care she needed.
Another part is that our boys woke up, everyday of their four and eight-year lives, with a grandparent living in the same house.
“God’s law is an unspeakably good and precious thing, and to live within it is to live the life that is eternal. To be sure, (God’s) law is not the source of rightness, but it is forever the course of rightness.3
The Potency of Holiness
Our bodies know the differences between darkness and light better than our minds. While surprised that a candle has lit up the whole gymnasium, our bodies have already started walking towards it.
Light is more than the absence of darkness. And holiness is more than the absence of sin. If sin is the drum of water we drink from, then holiness is the teaspoon of bleach that makes the whole drum potable.
Her Inheritance
My moms inheritance is in answering her highest calling. It was poured out into her three men, into her new family, and also for those who saw her race, finished well.
And like the story of the thief on the cross, who had no hope before that fateful day, may the retelling of her story inspire other families to stick together and light their own candles with the fire within. And may a spoonful of that be credited to the account of Grandma GG’s inheritance in the Kingdom of God.
In Our Muscle Memory
Grandma GG is still in our muscle memory and in the walls of the house. While writing these words, I’ve kept the room monitor on in my office in case Grandma GG needs something. Isabel and I still hear the bell she used to ring, and the pitch of her voice, calling for something. We’re still quiet on the phone so as not to wake her, and we keep feeling the need to break away from dinners with friends, because mom’s been alone for too long.
The Smirk on Lucas’ Face
Grandma GG did not abide orders or directives. There was a certain way she’d purse her lips and stare when orders were detected. That’s when you knew there wasn’t a thing in the world that could move her. You’d just settled the matter; nothing would move her until she was good and ready.
One day, while giving an order to our two-year-old, I looked over to see something that brought chills of deja’vu. Lucas had the same eyes, and curled up smirk, I’ve seen on my mothers face for fifty years. I knew immediately the battle lines were drawn, and he had the upper hand. My mother’s will-not-abide smirk had been transmuted right onto Lucas’ defiant face.
I can only imagine the deep-rooted pig-headedness originating from ancient celtic roots that is now a weapon in his arsenal. And, boy, it’s a good one. Grandma GG would love knowing that she had left her Lucas Michael, so well-armed. As foreboding a look as it is, I love seeing her smirk on Lucas’ face. Even though I know what I’m in for.
Timothy’s Willy Wonka House
“When you love someone you go to the ends of the earth for them.”
— Aunt Bernie
Timothy doesn’t have Grandma GG’s defiant smirk. What he inherited from Grandma GG is waking up for the first eight years of his life with grandparents living in the same house. He has the cookies and candy in her drawer, her birthday gifts, the coca-cola Santa Claus kisses, and grandparents’s day at school.
When watching the original Willy Wonka, Timothy saw nothing odd in all the grandparents in the bed. To him, it was a matter-of-fact depiction of the way all families live. Families take care of one another, come what may, and no one is left behind.
Conclusion
Prior to my mom’s passing, Isabel had never experienced the death of an immediate family member. Now, as a reluctant veteran, perhaps she’d agree that death, compared to life, is a simple thing.
Death doesn’t give meaning to life; it just imposes a deadline on the project to perfect the soul our bodies are bound to, for a while. The body gives out, and the soul is released, to forever be what it became under the care of our earthly stewardship.
The greatest gift of life is the chance to shape, and try to perfect, the state of our immortal souls.
May we prepare for death like a bel canto singer navigates through the passagio of the upper-middle voice; switching over to a new set of involuntary muscles so the voice may gracefully ascend into its highest range.
But, She’s Ours!
Two weeks after she died, Lucas asked, “When are they going to send Grandma GG back?”
“What do you mean, Lucas?”, Isabel asked.
“When are they going to be done working on her body … (counting on his fingers) … “1-day, 2-days, 3-days, 4-days, 5-days?”
“She’s not coming back, Lucas. We have to go see her.”
“But, she’s ours!”, he said.
Then, last week, Lucas asked the same question. When Isabel told him Grandma GG was gone he yelled, “But, she’s ours! Why can’t they fix her body and send her back?!” before crying for five minutes; an eternity for a four-your-old.
Yes, honey. She’s ours.
And we will never forget her, nor the last time we saw her, this morning as she prepared for her journey and waved goodbye and slipped the surly bonds of earth to touch the face of God.4
Songbirds, P.S.
Alright, mom. These words hardly begin to summarize your life. But, you’d be happy with a few highlights in your son’s voice. It must have been awesome to get out of that bed and stretch out into a walk!
Remember when Dad borrowed Wendell’s RV and we camped and drove across the whole country? Dad wore out those Fleetwood Mac tapes and almost killed us on the mesa verde mountain curves.
My least favorite song is the one I can’t get out of my head. It reminds me of you and dad. You guys are together, now, like you imagined for all those years watching the golf channel. Every time that bell rings it feels like you’re still here. I’m glad, we’re glad, that, “For you, there’ll be no more crying.”
For you, the sun will be shining.
And I feel that you’re with us
And It’s alright, I know it’s right.
My songbirds are singing, like they know the score.
And I love you, I love you, I love you, like never before.
