September 2009 - McGillespie

Children

Living With My In-Laws (One Year Later)

By Terence Gillespie September 28, 2009

It’s been 13 months since we moved my mother in to live with us. She was in a nursing home and it was time to get her out of there. Just prior, my mother and father-in-law moved in to live with us, as well. Five months later Timothy, our first child, was born.

That’s five adults, one baby and two dogs spread accross 4 generations; all living under one roof.

Our house was large enough, we had a baby on the way, needed help taking care of my mother and my in-laws were looking for a way to decrease their expenses and take life a little easier. For more background on the decision and the story of moving in together see Why I Live With My In-Laws.

This is an update to that article.

How’s It Going? – Bottom Line

Extremely well, with unexpected benefits and problems and ways to handle each.

Unexpected Benefits

Part of the ‘unexpected’ benefits are how much I didn’t expect to appreciate the benefits listed in my previous article as much as I do. Division of labor, economies of scale, precious time with family, help with mom. It’s one thing to think about these things and its quite another to experience them in your everyday life.

Grandparents for Timothy

This was just an idea last year when everyone moved in. Now, its real. The reality of having Timothy, Martha, Fabio and my mom together in the same house is truly priceless. There’s only three people on the planet that love Timothy as much as Isabel and I do. Having them all under one roof is a daily unfolding wonder and blessing. Even now I may not fully appreciate all the aspects and advantages to Timothy, and all of us.

And the babysitting? Are you kidding me? Who ya gonna call? Isabel and I haven’t had to contemplate the tradeoffs, risks and worries of leaving Timothy with a stranger as we run errands or just want to spend some alone time, together.

This is way beyond money.

Productivity at Home

I work at home. With an 8 month old baby it’s a miracle I can be so productive out of a home office. Sure, we could drop Timothy off at day care. He spends all day with his grandparents and me in what has to be the ideal environment. Even if we incurred the cost, risk and effort to leave Timothy at day care it would be a downgrade in the quality of his life and ours.

Daughter and Father

Isabel and Fabio have a similar temperament: They’re both quick to react and quick to wind down. At first, we all thought they’d be arguing with each other since they’re so similar. Nope. Turns out they’re so in tune with each other that things get resolved almost before they happen.

Daughter and Mother

Isabel and Martha don’t have the same tempermant. But, they are both very feminine and give ideas to each other in a non-competitive way. They may not admit this but I think they motivate each other to do more.

In other words, they both do more than they would without each other.

Mother-in-Law and Son-in-Law (Me)

Martha and I both tend to “Work behind the scenes” to accomplish our goals. Now we conspire with each other for the same purpose.

Nerve Center for Family

With five (Instead of two) adults in the same house its easier to keep in touch with extended family members and friends. That’s more connection for less effort. Since these are people we love and care about that is a very good thing.

All of us enjoy having guests. We have more guests because there are more people to visit. And, we enjoy them more because we’re all pitching in to entertain.

As a single man until the age of 44 I traveled for Christmas 20 years in a row. Now, I’m thrilled to have most of the family here and pass the travel burden onto the remaining single members of the family or those looking to take a break in wine country.

Circular Benefits

Everything that benefits one of us loops back around to benefit all of us. Here are some examples of how this plays out:

My productivity at home leads to peace of mind and more abundance brought into our house. That peace of mind is felt by Timothy and sets an example for him that its possible to live a great life and not be stressed out all the time. More abundance leads to the ability to sustain our lifestyle.
Isabel is freed up from most of the conventional tasks on a new mother’s list. The way I put it is, by the time her alarm clock rings in the morning, she has accomplished more than most new mothers can in two days.
We purchased reclining couches for the living room to make it more comfortable to watch TV. That lead to ‘movie night’ Fridays. Movie night is a great excuse for everyone to spend time together. It also saves on the $150 it would cost for all four of us to go to the movie theatre after coke, popcorn, babysitting and who knows what else.

Unexpected Problems

And what about me and my new in-laws? Most people have trouble even with roomates. How about living with two new roomates you’re just getting to know? There had to be problems and arguments and blow-ups, don’t you think?

Not really. Sure, we’ve had our misunderstandings while getting to know each other, but, nothing more. Once you translate the culture and language our underlying goals are so united there’s nothing to argue about.

The real surprise was watching Fabio and Martha go through the adjustment of living with each other while spending the whole day together. They’d raised two kids and been married for 30 years, but, had never spent as much daily time together as when they moved in with us.

Trash

We do more shopping online, nowadays. Things that would normally come together in a bag get delivered separately in a box. That brings more boxes into the house. With baby showers, birthdays, more guests, medical supplies and holidays we have a lot of trash!

I’m bad about remembering trash day. That’s a disaster with six people in the house. One false move and we’ll never catch up without a trip to the dump.

Fabio has taken to overseeing our trash situation. Believe me, when I wake up on Friday morning and don’t have to panic at the sound of the garbage trucks I’m very grateful.

Space & House Layout

More people means more guests. Guests need a place to stay. Our only ‘spare’ room was my office. So, whenever we had guests I had to give up my office. Sure, I could use the computer during the day, but, at least half of my productivity happens at night after everyone is asleep.

Guests were’nt the only reason for a new home office. The only room that could hold my filing cabinets, computer, books, reference materials and have room for a meeting with another person was my first office. That was also the only downstairs room available for my mom. As it turned out, using the last remaining bedroom upstairs didn’t work for several reasons:

When guests came I lost night-time use of the office. For me that was about half of my productivity.

The room was not really all mine. Isabel kept her office books, cabinets, lights and reference materials in the room. The closet was half full of her stuff and the other half was an overflow closet used by Martha.

My office was half upstairs and half downstairs. I had to go up and down the stairs three times just to stage the items needed to work on a project. Any doorbell ring or need for additional materials would send me upstairs and downstairs, yet again.

And so . . .

The Man Cave is Born

What this all lead to was the need to create another room in the house. The optimal room would be:

Downstairs.
Big enough for all the ‘tools’ for my work.
Not infringe on another mandatory use of space.
Accessible, but not too accessible to the daily activities of the house.

And so, my friend David and carved out 1/3 of our 3-car garage and made it into an office. It took 2.5 months of back-breaking work. Frankly, it was a study in the drawbacks and benefits of working on only one goal and ignoring all others. One day I’ll write an article on whether or not that’s the optimal approach.

Although I had designed an addition to the house that would have been perfect it was just too expensive to build considering all the other purchases I was making to make sure we’d make it through this terrible downturn in the economy.

Person by Person

In my first article I said there had to be something in it for everyone for the whole multi-generational living to work. Now that we’ve been together 13 months let’s go person by person and look at how its been for each one of us.

Mom

The joy on my mom’s face when she see’s Timothy (Every day) says it all.

On her second trip to the doctor, four months after moving in, he couldn’t believe how much she had improved. And that was before Timothy was born. We have lunch every day together and sometimes even a party on the patio. Timothy looks over and screams when mom waves at him and that’s a great ‘conversation’ to watch.

My mom’s health is not well and she doesn’t always cooperate with Martha when its time to do her exercises. However, I have my doubts that she’d be with us, at all, if it weren’t for the comfort and care she receieves by living with us.

Martha

Martha is obviously happy and also a bit restless. She’s taken on another child to take care of during the day for extra income and earns every penny of it.

Fabio

Fabio loves being at home. Later, he’ll probably need to get out more. But, for now there’s plenty going on in the house to entertain.

Timothy

Timothy gets parents who are smiling and not stressed out. He has the priceless attention and love of his grandparents. He feels the support of living in a home where everyone is looking out for each other and gets far more interaction than would be possible in daycare.

He’s learning Spanish as his first language and will pick up english like a sponge when it’s time. He might even be ready to learn a third by the time most students are deciding on a second.

Isabel

Before Isabel’s alarm clock goes off in the morning she’s gotten more ‘done’ than most mothers could in three days. That’s because most of what needs to be done around the house is split between myself, Fabio, Martha or other Martha (Who comes to clean house three times a month).

“People like doing things for me.”, she says. As a smart husband I won’t touch that statement.

Me

When I was single just thinking about living like this would have been like thinking about walking on the moon. Even now its an unfolding mystery. I’m suprised to find very little on the internet written about the subject coming from Americans. For economic reasons I predict that’s going to change.

Ironically, being willing to give up the freedom I had when I was single has been the very means of becoming more free than I’ve ever felt in my life.

I’m surprised the whole arrangement goes as well as it does.

What Happens Around Here

Here’s some things that happen around here:

Almuerzo – Spanish for “Lunch”. Everyday at 12pm prepared by Fabio. You know its happening when the intercom rings.
Movie Night – We bought special couches that recline so up to 6 people can recline in comfort. I figure every movie saves us $150 though saving money wasn’t the motivation.
Boys Day / Girls Day – With lots of people around this need becomes obvious. The girls want to do their thing without prying eyes. The boys want to do their thing without hearing comments.

Everybody’s Got Their Secret Stash

Martha has her sweets, mom’s got her cookies, Fabio has his whisky and I have my figs and wine. Isabel doesn’t have to keep a stash because Fabio keeps it for her for. Or maybe she’s just better at keeping secrets than we are.

What Our Friends Said?

Last month our friends and family told us they gave us two months, tops.

Can you blame them? What odds do you give someone bungy jumping from a helicopter?

And this article is not a, “See?, We TOLD you it would work!” I can’t do that because the lifestyle is an unfolding mystery. I can tell you the benefits and drawbacks in retrospect, but, the future is not predictable.

One of my favorite comments was, “If we predict failure we only have to be right once. For you to pronounce success you have to be right 24 hours a day, forever”. That’s only true if we took some kind of club oath. I’d say being happy for a solid year counts for a good measure of success.

Hernan (Fabio’s brother) thanked Fabio, not me, for his hospitality for a 2 week stay at the house. It occured to me, that night, that it was a sign of the success of living together. It’s not really my house, anymore. Its “our” house.

The things I have are just things I’m using while I’m alive. They don’t seem like mine, really. They’re just things and tools and materials. Now the house has become just another tool to get a job done.

Coverage

One of my favorite benefits is coverage. Here’s some examples:

If I need to run an errand I have coverage for Timothy and mom’s care.
If Isabel needs to work late she has coverage for Timothy. Tasks she ‘meant’ to get done that night can be delegated to us and she’ll probably have dinner waiting for her when she gets home.
If Fabio wants to go to Colombia for a few weeks he can pack a few things and go. He can easily plug back into his routine upon return.
If Martha needs the afternoon to go the doctor there’s not much planning needed for Fabio and I to cover for her.

The real value of coverage is that it is general and flexible. As things come up for each of us we know others are there to cover for us. Its a general comfort that becomes specific as life events unfold.

BBQs

I love BBQ’s. With more people and guests there are more excuses to have one. There’s also more oppurtunity to combine events like birthdays and anniversaries.

Cadence of the Day

Our days unfold with a cadence that marks time and gives things to look forward to. I know for sure this doesn’t happen when you’re single.

The Future

Fabio and Martha have considered selling their home in Orlando and probably would if the market allows.

If we have a second child the guest room goes to the baby. Even with the garage office I built to free up an official guest room we’ll be left with no spare rooms.

A prolonged recession in the US is now guaranteed. That makes our living situation even more beneficial. Perhaps these articles will be helpful to more Americans as they contemplate throwing in, together.

Children

Swine Flu Insanity

By Terence Gillespie September 21, 2009

Most Medical Doctors won’t take it.
Nobody knows for sure what’s in it.
Insurance companies refuse to insure medical professionals who inject it.
The companies making it have insisted the government grant them total liability protection for any complications resulting from it.
One of the known ingredients in multidose vials is mercury.
It will not be ready in time to be tested in any scientific way.
The trials that have been conducted have not been performed with the same vaccine that will be given to the public.
The H1N1 strain for which it has been prepared has already mutated so that the ‘vaccine’ can not possibly help your immune system with the old original H1N1 strain which is now gone.

Last, but, not least: When a similar vaccination program was undertaken in 1976 it killed 250 people and left an enormous number of neurologically damaged and crippled while creating a brand new “Made in USA” autoimmune disease called Guillain-Barre Syndrome (GBS).

Ok, that’s my list, against, written as a concerned parent. Buckle up your seatbelts for 18 more from a truly thorough full-time health advocate, Bill Sardi. Then come back to put this insanity in perspective on what this artificial crisis is really about, if you’ve got the time.

Why would anyone take this shot?

Simple:

Few people have the time or desire to research these things.
Reading medical research documents is hardly the preferred way to relax after a hard days work.
The CDC says it will save us though offers zero evidence to back up their evasive recommendations.

So, in the end people just go with their doctors’ recommendation (Who is probably not going to take it, themselves).

To make matters far worse you have states like Massachusetts trying to pass a law that will fine people $1000 per day or 30 days in jail for not taking the shot. Given that the ingredients are not even known what exactly is this law even based on? We know congress doesn’t read the laws they pass, but, this takes it to a new level of incompetence.

Don’t Take My Word for It

In his latest Newsletter Russell L. Blaylock, M.D. says:

“Right now, the government is working hard to implement a draconian program to vaccinate the population by force. This is an absolutely insane idea. If they mandate that all Americans be vaccinated, I predict that we will see an unprecedented number of vaccine-related deaths (as many as 250 died during the 1976 vaccine fiasco) and an enormous number of neurologically damaged and crippled people. The vaccine tested for safety before the 1976 scare was not the one used — the actual vaccine given to the public was untested. We may be seeing the same thing again. I suspect that the dangerous MF-59 adjuvant (squalene) will not be in the vaccine used for the test, but will be in the one given to the public. MF-59 is an immune-boosting additive that has been associated with severe autoimmune diseases,such as Lupus and multiple sclerosis-like disorders. There is a potential for millions of people to be crippled by these vaccine-induced diseases. As for the flu itself, at the time of this writing it is considered to be a low virulent virus — meaning that it is no worse than any other flu in the recent past. Those who are dying are not dying from the virus itself, but from a cytokine storm. Their bodies’ reaction to the virus is what is actually killing them. It was recently reported that smokers were found to have an intense inflammatory reaction deep within their lungs when exposed to the flu virus. One wonders how many of those who died were smokers or had immune disorders, but the CDC is keeping silent.”

“The 1976 swine flu fiasco began when a single soldier died from the flu at Fort Dix. He was infected along with five other soldiers, but he decided to go on a forced march even though he was sick. A person can die from a common cold if forced to march — I know because I used to see these soldiers when I was in the service. The other soldiers were tested and found to have a common strain of flu. The CDC analyzed the blood of the soldier who died and announced he had the swine flu strain. The news triggered a panic. The public was not told that a sergeant gave the soldier mouth-to-mouth resuscitation, but did not contract the flu. I suspect that the CDC mistyped the virus. Here we go again!”

Spermicide, Cleaners, and Cosmetics along with Thimerosal and Squalene Found in Experimental H1N1 Vaccine

Our first glimpse into the actual ingredients is coming at this late date of 09/14/2009. Here’s an article written by a guy who volunteered for one of the rushed trials just to see what he could find out about the ingredients.

Dr. Sherri Tenpenny and Russell Blaylock say:

To download their two fliers that summarize the medical facts about flu vaccines and where the swine flu fits in to the picture. Print them out and show them to your loved ones to focus what can be a difficult conversation.

For more comprehensive information see Dr. Blaylocks web page. or Dr. Tenpenny’s vaccine information center.

Here’s an article comparing the Swine Flu Hoax to the 1918 pandemic during world war I.

Swine Flu: Natural Pandemic or Man-Made Pandemonium?

Lila Rajiva Puts It All Together for us explaining the real motivations behind this latest hoax and future medical crimes against humanity we’re likely to see in the future.

Get Daily Updates

You can get up to date tracking on the coming flu “pandemic”, here.

Family

What French Women Know about Estrogen…and American Women Don’t!

By Terence Gillespie September 18, 2009

(Excerpted from Dr. Elizabeth Lee Vliet’s forthcoming book: The Savvy Woman’s Guide to Estrogen: What America Got Wrong. . . and How To Do It Right)

Many of you saw the national news reports in late February 2007 announcing the findings of the ESTHER study, sponsored by health agencies of the French government. ESTHER, which stands for Estrogen and Thromboembolism Risk, showed that women taking oral estrogens were four times more likely to have a blood clot than women using estrogen in a transdermal gel or patch delivery. In fact, the women using estradiol gel or patches had no more blood clots than women using no hormones at all (placebo)! 56% of ESTHER women on transdermal therapy were using estradiol gel.

I wrote about lower risk of blood clots with non-oral estrogen in the first edition of Screaming to Be Heard, published in 1995. Studies since the 1970s have shown this important difference between oral and transdermal estrogen. Research data has become even stronger to support this longstanding observation that differences in the way hormones are delivered play a major role in safety vs. complications.

In the United States, this research comes as a surprise to women and most doctors. But French women and their doctors have known about these differences for over thirty years…what gives? The answer may lie in the different types of hormone products doctors prescribe in the U.S.A. and Europe.

American women have traditionally been given oral pills of Premarin (a mixture of horse estrogens) or Prempro (horse estrogens plus a potent synthetic progestin). Both products contain hormones that are foreign to the human body, and not identical to anything women make naturally. Yet, these two products alone have accounted for 80 to 85% of all hormone prescriptions in the United States for the last fifty years!

European women, on the other hand, have traditionally used products with bioidentical estradiol and progesterone, hormones that are identical to what the human body makes.

But even more critical is the difference in route of delivery here in the U.S.A. compared to Europe: 70% of women in France and Italy, for example, use transdermal forms of estradiol such as gels, lotions or patches that have been approved by their regulatory bodies (like our FDA). Contrast that 70% with the U.S. statistics: only 3% of American women use a transdermal form of estradiol, even though British researchers first published studies in the 1970s showing reduced risk of blood clots with non-oral estrogen.

One of the most successful options overseas, EstroGel, a pleasant, easy-to-use clear gel containing bioidentical estradiol, was approved by the French equivalent of the FDA about 30 years ago! Today, EstroGel is the most widely used form of estradiol in Europe. Even though EstroGel has been used so successfully in European countries for so many years, American women did not get this product until the FDA approved it in February 2004! So it seems the French have handled women’s hormone therapy a lot better than the Americans have for a long, long time!

Keep in mind, all of the various products using 17-beta estradiol deliver the identical molecular copy of a woman’s premenopausal estrogen.

Transdermal estradiol products deliver the human 17-beta estradiol in a way that is the most “natural” of all. The estradiol is absorbed through the skin, directly into the bloodstream, similar to the release of hormones from the ovaries. Direct delivery to the bloodstream bypasses the “first pass” metabolism in the liver that breaks down and changes estradiol into other forms that may not be as effective for its normal functions.

The primary difference between pill form and transdermal gel/patch is that oral estrogens all have to be metabolized (changed) first in the liver, called the “first pass” effect. Everything we eat swallow by mouth goes through the liver first so it can be changed into compounds that can be carried in the bloodstream. This first pass through the liver stimulates production of some clotting factors and proteins that lead to both pluses, and minuses, or oral medications.

One “plus” of oral estrogen is that it stimulates the liver to make more of the “good” cholesterol, or HDL. That means if you are a woman who has a very low level of HDL, you may need this boost in production provided by oral estrogen for the heart-protective effects of HDL. EstroGel, Estrasorb lotion or the patches (Climara and Vivelle DOT) still give you the natural physiological benefits of estradiol to maintain the normal level of HDL cholesterol. They just don’t give you that “first-pass” liver stimulation to ramp up production of HDL.

The “minuses” of oral estrogen can lead to a higher risk of blood clots: the liver “first-pass” effect can stimulate more production of clotting factors that in some women can cause deep vein thrombosis (DVT), or blood clots to the lungs, called pulmonary emboli (PE). Obesity, smoking, and inactivity, and genetic mutations like Factor V Leiden (a blood coagulation disorder) further increase the risk of clots.

Other “minuses” of oral estrogens, particularly mixed equine estrogens like Premarin, include stimulation of liver production of triglycerides (a blood fat associated with increased risk of heart disease if too high), renin (a substance that can cause high blood pressure), and greater likelihood of gallstones if you have a predisposition to those problems.

American women often say that “pills are easier” and they don’t want to be bothered with putting on the gel, or they don’t like the look of the “ring” with the patches as the adhesive around the edge picks up lint from clothes. But if it makes an important difference for your health, aren’t these pretty minor problems?

Apparently French women think so—and the widespread use of EstroGel throughout Europe attests to its ease of use and pleasant, non-greasy feeling on the skin. So maybe it’s time for you to get savvy and take advantage of the estrogen benefits and lower risks that European women have known for so long!

Advantages of transdermal delivery include:

Transdermal delivery bypasses the first step in the liver that oral medicines undergo. It is this “first pass” in the liver that causes an unwanted increase in clotting factors that lead to higher risk of blood clots;
It maintains steadier blood levels of estradiol, similar to the hormone production by the ovary (helpful for women with
blood pressure or “hormonal” headache problems);
It leads to better improvement in glucose control and insulin sensitivity than with oral estrogens;
It causes less rise in blood level of estrone, the estrogen of body fat, than seen with oral estrogens, again because transdermal estradiol bypasses the liver “first pass;”
The estradiol is less likely to be adversely affected by other medications, since it is not metabolized first in the liver;
Transdermal delivery of estradiol does not elevate triglycerides as occurs in some women taking oral estrogens;
Non-oral estradiol is less likely to cause gallstones;
Transdermal estradiol helps maintain a premenopausal healthy balance of good HDL to bad LDL cholesterol even though it doesn’t raise HDL as rapidly or quite as high as oral estrogens.

The bottom line is that many of the health risks you have heard about from “estrogen” in the headlines over the last five years have been based on the Women’s Health Initiative studies using only horse-derived oral estrogens and synthetic progestins. My clinical experience over twenty years, and the international research, show that those risks don’t apply in the same way to all other types of estrogens and other ways of giving the hormone, such as transdermal.

The WHI—which studied older postmenopausal women using either Premarin alone if they had a hysterectomy, or Prempro(horse estrogens plus medroxyprogesterone acetate, a potent synthetic progestin) if they did not—is the major U.S. study that has caused so much turmoil and confusion about hormones since 2002. The WHI was presented in the press as a study of “healthy” menopausal women.

Healthy? Only in America would we call women with these characteristics “healthy!” No country in Europe has such a high percentage of hypertension or obesity, both of which are risk factors for stroke, heart disease and breast cancer. Consider these statistics from the WHI study data:

35% of the women were already being treated for high blood
pressure.
35% were significantly overweight.
Another 34% were obese by the medical definition, making
a total of 69% of the entire study group having an abnormal
body mass index, which affects all kinds of health risks from
breast cancer to cardiovascular disease.
12.5% had high enough cholesterol to require medication.
16% had a family history of breast cancer.
4% had diabetes.
40% were former smokers, and 10% continued to smoke cigarettes during the study.

These women were “typical” Americans maybe, but certainly not “healthy.”

The only thing meant by healthy in the published research studies was that the women in the study just didn’t have symptoms of menopause! I’ll bet you didn’t even know that the WHI even excluded women experiencing hot flashes! Seems strange, doesn’t it?

Older women in the WHI already had evidence of heart disease, high cholesterol and high blood pressure. So these baseline problems affect the response to hormones, especially when high dose, “unnatural” products are used in women so long after menopause.

Recent worldwide research on hormone use has shown there is a “window of opportunity” early in the menopause transition for hormone therapy to prevent damage to various tissues and organs. Once this window of time is past, however, hormone therapy doesn’t reverse damages that have occurred. This was demonstrated clearly in the Women’s Health Initiative using Premarin and Prempro in elderly postmenopausal women.

The International Menopause Society position paper in September, 2002, said: “The WHI results, and particularly the data on cardiovascular disease risk, should only be related to the continuous combined treatment of 0.625 mg CEE (conjugated equine estrogens, Premarin) together with 2.5 mg MPA (medroxy-progesterone acetate), prescribed to elderly, obese women with characteristics similar to those depicted in the WHI study”.² (Parenthetical explanations by Elizabeth Lee Vliet, M.D.).

In fact, the above comments and WHI findings validate concerns I have been raising about Premarin and Prempro in my previous books and medical articles since the early 1990s.

And now, French researchers have given us even more fuel for the fire that there are other, safer ways to use estrogen— ways that help you feel better, feel more vital and energetic, and not have all the risks you have read about in the press.

Now it’s time for American women to appreciate, and benefit from, the differences in type of estrogen and how it can be given to better meet individual needs. If you are using, or considering, estrogen to relieve menopausal symptoms, ask your doctor if you can try EstroGel or one of the patch brands that are FDA-approved bioidentical options for estradiol.

As the French say, Vive la difference!

© 2007 Elizabeth Lee Vliet, M.D., Permission to reprint in whole (Not in part) is gladly granted, provided full credit is given. Visit Dr. Vliet at her main office in Tucson and explore much more at her website, www.HerPlace.com aka HER Place®